Do You Need More Qualifications to Serve People and Make the Impact You Want?

For women and feminine people especially, I think we often get caught in the loop of thinking we need more credentials, degrees, "proof" that we can offer something of value to other people. At the same time, we're often told we struggle with "visibility issues" and fear of being seen. Which brings us back to thinking maybe we can solve that by building up more "expertise or credibility." But what if what we need ourselves, and coincidentally what we're here to do for others, is actually just to see? To see someone with love and encouragement, for our true selves not who we are expected or told to be, and for who we could be if we only allowed ourselves to really be who we are?

I've been working with a somatic therapist for a while now and this is someone who has restored a lot of faith in medical practitioners for me. Because most of my life, going to doctors, psychologists, "specialists," etc. only meant one thing: Invalidation. And honestly, people who never seemed to actually understand my needs.

In recent sessions and weeks, I've been connecting a lot to 8-year old me. And she's had a lot to teach me. She went through some serious trauma and worst thing was, the people who were supposed to help - only made it worse.

I spent 20 years with a deep distrust in anyone with a medical degree (and honestly, that distrust will probably always linger a little) and the feeling that I was to blame for my pain, that needing help meant I was ill-intending, and that I was always supposed to have all the answers.

I was reading through some comments on my content and one comment stood out to me as something that felt so powerful and something I've noticed as a pattern, which was "I felt so seen."

And that got me thinking, about everything I've been moving through lately, about what my work around feminine archetypes really is about, and the community and mentorship space I'm building... and it had me thinking about something so simple yet profound: To be seen.

To be seen for who we really are, not who we were told to be or expected to be or said we were. To be seen for our true heart and wisdom. To be seen with love, not judgement. To be seen as human beings with human needs and human rights, not as machines or manipulators or lazy or weak. Just seen. Really seen.

Ironically, so many people (especially women and feminine people) struggle with visibility and fear of being seen. But I would like to propose we often don't actually have "visibility issues." Instead, we often have experiences with being seen in a really harmful way. In not being seen at all and experiencing harm because of it. In having to protect someone else's image to survive so we avoid being seen ourselves because otherwise we'd blow up the carefully put together image someone else has created about themselves.

I often reflect on what I really want to be doing in my work, what the purpose really is. I worry about all the alternatives that exist out there and "why would people stick around with me?" I end up worrying that I should have more qualifications, more credentials and fancy degrees.

But truth be told, the main part of why I love working with the therapist I work with now, is because she actually has experience with the same challenges. I could speak to some 60-year old dude with a long list of credentials, but he would never understand the way my mind, body, and soul feel.

And I feel there's so much less for me to do as a guide inside Her Kind, because just being there to see someone, maybe for the first time, with so much love, validation, and encouragement... is already more than so many of us have ever had.

That's also why I love discussing the feminine archetypes, because to me they are a lens in which we can see ourselves. A way that we can see more of our qualities and strengths with a focus on seeing what's actually inside instead of being told who we are from people who don't even see us.

So that's what I'm holding onto. For every interaction with you, be it in a podcast episode, an email or reflection, or as a member inside Her Kind... my aim is to see you. And through that, help you see you too.

Because I believe with all my heart, there's so much good to see in you. If we only do the work of actually looking.