How to Stop Perfectionism Procrastination and Trust Yourself Instead

There's a common experience I notice in women who have been living their lives as good girls, constantly chasing, perfecting, striving to meet their goals, and feeling disconnected from their intuition and true selves: Thinking you need to be perfect before you even start, getting caught in perfectionism procrastination and not trusting yourself, which then keeps you stuck and prevents you from making real progress.

If you’ve been caught in the cycle of perfectionism, it’s likely because you grew up in an environment where mistakes were met with criticism, judgment, or expectations not to make them at all. Where being ‘good’ meant never failing, never disappointing anyone, and always doing what was expected. But here’s the thing: You can’t know what you don’t know. I know that sounds obvious, but stay with me here...

Sometimes we expect ourselves to see the next ten steps ahead before we’re even willing to take the first one. We want a guarantee that everything will go perfectly and that we’ll never mess up, feel embarrassed, or face criticism. And that makes sense, in a way, as this is what we learned growing up would keep us "good and acceptable."

So we stay stuck - waiting for that mythical moment when we feel ‘ready’ or ‘perfect enough’ to begin. But life doesn’t work that way.

When you’re caught up in perfectionism, it’s easy to forget that who you are and what you know one step ahead will be different from who you are and what you know right now. Each step forward changes you. It expands your perspective, confidence, and understanding of what’s possible.

That’s why trying to figure out the next ten steps from where you are now is impossible, because you can only see as far as your current perspective allows. But once you take one step, your view changes, and you suddenly have access to new information, new experiences, and new resources you couldn’t have imagined before.

This is also why self-trust isn't "having all the answers." It's trusting yourself as you move through things and trusting that you'll be able to handle what unfolds.

Letting the journey unfold in layers is especially important when it comes to healing and growth. No single teacher, book, or program can give you everything you’ll ever need because what you need will evolve as you grow. If you’re at "level one" and want to get to "level ten," no single step, 'hack,' or program can take you the entire way.

And honestly, what you imagine level ten to be right now is likely not what it will be once you get there. You can’t know what your true level ten looks like until you’ve walked through level nine and grown into the person who’s ready to step into that version of you.

And that’s why getting started with one specific thing, and staying devoted to it for as long as it feels aligned, is so valuable. Because if you keep waiting to figure out all the steps before you begin, you’ll stay stuck in perfectionism procrastination, endlessly planning and perfecting without ever moving forward.

I remember when I first started my own journey. I took a leap of faith and committed to a program that, at the time, felt like a perfect fit. And it was - for that version of me.

That program opened up a world of possibilities. It challenged me to grow, helped me build my confidence, and connected me with people who expanded my perspective. And yet, I don’t really engage with that program or its community anymore. It no longer resonates with who I’ve become.

But I wouldn’t be where I am today without it. Back then, I couldn’t have imagined feeling the way I do now. I had no idea how much I would change, or how my vision for my life would evolve.

I couldn’t see the path ahead because I hadn’t walked it yet. But by committing to that first step, I discovered things about myself that I never would have known if I had stayed stuck, waiting for the ‘perfect plan.’

This is why taking the first step matters. It’s not about getting into action for the sake of staying busy or doing something just to say you did. It’s about opening the first door and allowing yourself to discover what you don’t know exists yet.

When you take that first step, you send a powerful message to yourself and the Universe: 'I am ready to grow. I am willing to heal. I am willing to step out of my comfort zone for something better than comfort - for authenticity, alignment, and truth. For the real me.'

This is how you move past showing up as the good girl where perfection, approval, and a guarantee of success before you even start are demanded. Because if you’re waiting to be perfect, you’ll be waiting forever.

If you’ve been waiting for permission to be imperfect, to start messy, and to grow through the process rather than before it - let me offer it to you now: It’s okay to feel unsure. It’s okay to not have all the answers. It’s okay for things to be a work in progress.

Because perfection isn’t what’s going to get you where you want to go - courage and devotion to your true self are. So, if there’s something you’ve been putting off because you’re worried you’re not ready or you’re scared to make a mistake, consider this your invitation to take the first step.

You don’t have to see the whole path. You just need to trust yourself enough to take one step at a time.

This is why I created Honestly You with the open-ended structure the way I did. Because there is no linear, perfect, or one-size-fits-all solution to your deepest needs and desires. And usually, we don't know everything about what we want or need, but we do know the next step - deep down.

And to release the good girl role you've been upholding in order to seem more "acceptable, nice, or easy to deal with" you need to reconnect with that inner knowing, with your true self - not the person you've been told or expected to be.

That's why the self-paced course journey inside Honestly You is designed to help you reconnect with your intuition and embrace who you truly are - imperfections and all. So that you can finally be free. Free to be you, free to be whole, free to trust yourself fully. So you can feel confident enough to make decisions on your own without needing to prove or justify yourself. And so you feel safe and peaceful within yourself first and foremost, even if others disagree with you.

I'm curious... What's your one next step ahead?

• If you didn't need to get it 'right' - what would you choose, say yes to, let go of, test out, or go for in your life right now?

• If you gave yourself permission to want what you want and need what you need - what would it be?

No matter where you go, your next level is waiting for you - whenever and however you choose to claim it. And it starts with one imperfect step forward, and then another, that eventually help you stop perfectionism procrastination and trust yourself instead. Not because you're perfect, but because you're whole even when it's messy. You've got this. Probably more than you think you do...